How ’bout a hug?

8 Oct

I’ve always been very particular about personal space. It’s just something I guard very carefully and only allow people to trespass this zone when I am extremely comfortable with them. This obsessive compulsive attitude I have over having people around me too close for comfort is what has made me notice something interesting about how others regard personal space. Here I’m going to concentrate on a specific type of body contact. The hug.
Have you ever notice how people hug? I have. The way people hug can tell you whether they’re comfortable with you or not also, whether they want to or not engage in this clear violation of personal space with you. Ok, so they are hugging you so you may think that they want to. Not necessarily, this could be because of many reasons, for instance they may have to either for courtesy sake, or because they feel obliged due to the circumstance meriting this exchange.

How do you know if you’re getting a fake hug? Pick up on how the hug is being administered. Here is how:

You get the pat hug. Yes, the pat in the back as they are hugging you.
Ok, so what is the “pat” you ask? Well, simply put is the courteous way a person can say to you “I’m done allowing you inside my personal space, get off me….now!” Once the patting has stopped that’s you cue to back away from the hug. It’s that simple.

There’s the half hug. The person hugging you is using one arm to accomplish the task. This allows them the control of when to finish it without being restrained by the other party.

The column hug. This is the one where the person giving the hug applies the “emergency break” and so the hug ends up looking like you’re both hugging a column placed in the middle of you.

And finally there is the infamous limp hug. This one is probably the most seen out there. This is the hug that gets administered with the least amount of effort from the person giving the hug as if to feel that you’re hugging a corpse. This would be THE hug I would dread getting the worst. This hug says, “I do NOT want to touch you and I don’t want you to touch me, but since I have to I’ll endure it pretending I’m unconscious.”

Now that you know what kind of hugs are out there don’t get caught in an awkward situation, recognize which hug you are being given and reciprocate. Let’s make the exchange bearable.

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